This slim volume is a standing ovation to bad behavior. Pieces include the godfather of bad behavior, an embittered Walmart greeter, Frankenstein (the ultimate mega Mack-Daddy), telephone terrorism, King Kong (self-defense tips), Patty Hearst meets Carl Jung, toilet bowl boosters, a miniature World War III, and…the world's only singing & dancing bank bandits.

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This is behavior at its eye-popping worst — rock bottom!

You can hit rock bottom by clicking on the rock.

Imagine -- holding hands with civilization and, together, jumping over the cliff.
The Museum of Sudden Disappearances is available at Amazon...and the Louvre Museum souvenir & snack shop. The original manuscript is on permanent exhibit inside the Louvre Pyramid. If you can't find it, ask the security guard.
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Step inside. Wander, wonder. Love the exhibits? Please, steal them. Make them reappear and sparkle in today's world. Rejoice. Hit the lights on the way out. You can read excerpt HERE.

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EXIT


"Black Mirror fans will be drawn in by Thomas Davidson's engrossing, hallucinatory tale of a screenwriter who stumbles into another dimension." -- Bella Wright, BestThrillers.com


5-star Amazon review for EXIT: "Amazing. Impressed beyond words; this is THE best read in the form of electronic media that I've read all year, and that is by no means an exaggeration."
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FEELING SLEEPY?

After you download this FREE tiny thriller, you will definitely...

WAKE UP


It's late. You're hungry. You need to stop the car and get a cup of coffee. Just ahead, you see a neon sign in the darkness. A cozy restaurant. No need to be afraid. Must be thousands of roadside eateries like this. Go on. Go inside. Relax. The city is snoozing at this hour, except in here. Because this place is...

OPEN ALL NIGHT
These Amazon readers are now suffering from anxiety disorder. Here's what they whispered from inside their locked cars while racing home.


5 Stars - TINY THRILLER, EXTRA LARGE SHOCK. "This deftly written short story, about vulnerability, recklessness, and evil, leaves you feeling chilled. The twists and terrible ironies pack quite a punch." - Francesca B - Australia

5 Stars - THRILLING! "As the book cover says, this literary miniature is absolutely thrilling." - Clarissa S.

4 Stars - NEEDING SOME EXCITEMENT! "A quick easy story about how actions of others can impact the life of an unsuspecting stranger. Kicks, greed and just plain evil all rolled up in this short story. I hope I never come in contact with any of these people." - mysin

5 Stars - AFTER SHOCK. "Amazing what you can do to a reader in 15 minutes. Awesome!!" - Bryan

5 Stars - FIVE STARS. "Love this strange story." - Patricia Z.

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Why not stop the car for 30 seconds and download a free copy of OPEN ALL NIGHT. So, are you ready to order? Tell the waitress, "Yes, I'd like a morsel of mayhem."
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Welcome to the past. Welcome to the present. Welcome to...
crocodile + connoisseur = crocoisseur

Definition of crocoisseur (also spelled: crock-o-sewer) noun.
1. a person who thrives on a steady diet of bad behavior.
2. a person who celebrates the endtimes of elegance, the meltdown of manners.

[from Greek, krok.o.krapp]



To help you make the transition from "moralist" to "connoisseur of the unrefined arts," here are...seven Stories, Exposés, Essays & Warnings (for connoisseurs of bad behavior).

my beta readers

connoisseurs on the sewer


What do these two fellows think of the book? Click HERE.

(click rock to make your life fall apart)

2016 KILLER NASHVILLE SILVER FALCHION AWARD WINNER 


​My second novel, PAST IS PRESENT, is a time-travel thriller. One quarter of the adult Western population believe they have had an out-of-body experience. In 1968, a young, Vietnam War widow takes an unplanned trip to 1993. Warning: past unsafe, future dark. Translation: when the past is present...the present is past.

"PURE JOY. The most compelling time-travel adventure we've read since Stephen King's 11/22/63." -- BestThrillers.com

Man is in love
And loves what vanishes; 
What more is there to say?


-- W.B. Yeats


"Voluptuous precision."


-- Teresa Carpenter, Pulitzer Prize-winning crime reporter. Thomas Davidson's work has appeared in The Boston Phoenix, and is excerpted in Carpenter's bestseller, Missing Beauty​.



"Tom Davidson always makes me laugh. Always. Tom is one of those people who not only sees the world with his own particular skew, he helps readers see it that way, too.  Check out his stories and find out why Tom Davidson is one of the best humor authors on this tilted planet."


-- Karen Dionne, author, THE  MARSH KING'S DAUGHTER 



"Thomas Davidson is undoubtedly one of the funniest writers alive today. I run ALL THINGS CRIME BLOG and post pieces by the inimitable Thomas Davidson every time I can convince him to send one my way. Thomas' rapier-like wit never disappoints. Some of the time he's making you laugh out loud; at other times, he catches you up short and you find yourself pondering the ways and means of this peculiar world, which after all is every writer's goal."

-- Patrick Moore, ALL THINGS CRIME BLOG, and author of CICERO'S DEAD


Click on the Statue of Liberty (with guitar) to connect to my blog.

​​​​​​Welcome to my digital domicile.
​
Let's remember to forget. Forget the F word ("forgettable" is the F word; never be forgettable). Here we salute the memorable letter M.











​This website celebrates the seven M words listed above. Perhaps you've heard the term 'F bomb?' Here we feature stories stuffed with 'M bombs​.'





​My thrillers, a mix of those M words, focus on ordinary (or quirky) people in extraordinary circumstances, who find themselves on a slippery slope. Next stop: a cliff. ​​If you're dying to somersault over a cliff, you've come to the right place. Hang gliders are advised. For summaries and excerpts, click on the titles listed on the menu (upper left). In the meantime...

Step right up.


Welcome to THE MUSEUM OF SUDDEN DISAPPEARANCES.
No ticket required. We never close. Looters welcome. 

​Free copies of PAST IS PRESENT are available to all time-travelers with frequent-flyer miles. In other words, if this buggy is parked inside your garage, you get the book!​

Thomas Davidson

​I recently finished EXIT, which is a change of pace from my "Jurassic JIm" Fleetwood thrillers. The story is a mix of dark suspense, sly humor, and a dystopian touch. This novel does not have as much humor as the "Jurassic Jim" novels, but it is (no surprise) edgy and offbeat. 


EXIT, a near-future thriller, is loosely based on my short story, "Exit," winner of San Francisco's 2013 Litquake Booktrack Halloween Short Story Competition.


You can read a brief description and an excerpt on my blog HERE. ​ Click on the Amazon button to exit over to EXIT for a full copy. 

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​For Kindle, click HERE for the Amazon link.

For all other formats, click HERE for Smashwords. 

If you want a cup of coffee, click...oh, never mind. Stay in the car. Doors locked. Hurry home. You need to put this neighborhood in your rearview mirror.


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more horn blowing
ATTENTION! Are you a...crocoisseur?

And  finally...a slender volume of humor. This is stuff I scribbled when not writing quirky thrillers. These pieces appeared in MudRock: Stories & Tales, All Things Crime, Booktrack, and my nightmares with a laugh track. I collected a handful, hence this svelte e-book. If you value bad behavior (I do) then you may savor these. 



Are you a connoisseur of bad behavior?



When does one officially become a connoisseur of crude conduct? On the day following the weary realization that you cannot stop, reduce, or even put a dent into the rising tide of bad behavior. It's a global pandemic, a meltdown of good manners. A tsunami of terrible tantrums. And a tidal wave is roaring toward you. You are a sentinel on civilization's shore, arms raised, stamping your feet in the sand and screaming, "Stop the shit--behave!" Alas. Here comes a thundering 900-foot wall of water exploding with sharks, sea snakes, piranhas, barracuda, torpedo rays and crocodiles. Good luck.


Surf's up!